What Would You Say if I Told You?
by Eien Mori
Summary: Duo is too scared to tell Heero his feelings, but how will a number of close situations change that? Shounen-ai, angst and violence.
1. The Object of My Affection

What Would You Say if I Told You...? By Eien Mori  
  
Act 1: 'The Object of My Affection'  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam wing, any of the characters herein, or "It's Just Love," if ya hadn't already guessed [NB. This isn't a songfic]. Warning: soppy, very mild 2+1 and angst  
  
Heero couldn't believe it. For the next mission, the Gundam pilots would have to share one room in a safe house. It was always hell- everyone would argue, Maxwell wouldn't stop talking and by the end of it he and Wufei would have given everyone death-threats. Heero was used to sharing rooms with Duo, but it was always much worse when they were all together. At least this time they would have a television, always useful to diffuse everyone, Duo was even bringing movies to watch. 'He's always thinking about others, even though he doesn't like to show it.' Heero dropped the thought immediately.  
  
For Duo, anytime with Heero was pleasurable, he could never say his feelings, which tore him apart, but he tortured himself by revelling in watching Heero sleep, noticing the patterns in his life; his reactions. Being in public together, especially sleeping near him in public made him nervous and excited. It seemed weird to Duo, but he knew it was the ambivalence that kept him coming back; it was a challenge. Duo wanted to be a couple with Heero, but he wasn't sure what sort of reaction he would get, he fantasised about revealing his feelings, but he couldn't bring himself to do it, distressing his heart further, as he knew what could have been. 'Will I tell you tonight?'  
  
Duo arrived at the safe house soon after Heero; no one else had arrived yet, he was rather pleased with this: it had been some time since he had been alone with Heero. In a corner of the one room they had, Heero had set up his laptop and barely looked away from the flashing screen.  
  
"Maxwell?"  
  
"Hey, Heero!" Heero continued to type, as Duo walked over and sat next to him, concealing his smile at hearing his name with a mischievous grin. Heero always worried when he saw that grin, well as worried as he ever became, usually Duo had just thought up a new thing to tease him with but Heero didn't let on. Duo had always hid his awkwardness by being a jerk, he knew it annoyed the person he cared for, but it was better than being rejected, specially in front of everyone, at least on their own Duo didn't have to do anything; the grin was enough.  
  
"Always at your laptop.hey buddy, give it a rest!" It was playful, but Duo hoped it didn't give himself away, although he wished for Heero to interpret it that way and return his emotions. Unfortunately, there's no way to say I love you so that it can be misinterpreted.  
  
"Hnn? This is the mission data, you'd better read over it." Heero replied coldly, ignoring Duo's suggestion completely. Duo hated being ignored like that; he'd much prefer to be called baka. Although all of the information was on the screen, Duo reached over to the touch pad so that he could brush Heero's arm, then moved the pointer, the reflex causing their arms to touch again. Heero's lack of reaction filled Duo with a sense of security, but it also tore him up, he imagined Heero taking Duo's hand in his own, and actually saying his first name. Fear was controlling Duo now, stopping him from blushing, but also from using his throat probably, he knew that if he had to speak, he would definitely choke.  
  
Trowa and Quatre entered the room, greeting Heero and Duo. Duo was supersensitive just then, looking around and quickly drawing in air.  
  
"Don't hyperventilate, baka" The joke from Heero upset Duo somewhat, 'what if he realised why I'm tense?' However, the joke alleviated the pain of being ignored, and the rarity of a personal comment, albeit provocation made it special to Duo in a strange way. Heero relaxed slightly, people entering a safe house made even The Perfect Soldier tense; as he relaxed, he pushed his arms out slightly, softly pressing against Duo's skin. 'Is he aware of that? Oh, God I hope so.' Duo started talking immediately, scared his thoughts should betray him, fortunately the interruption cleared Duo's throat, so he joked about Quatre to cover his blushing.  
  
As Heero showed Quatre and Trowa the mission data, Duo stared at him, thinking how perfect everything about Heero was- how the things that others might think of as faults suited him: his messy hair, even his cold face provided a basis for smiles that made them that much more special, because of the contrast. Duo had seen Heero's smile occasionally, it was really cute; whenever Duo saw it he just wanted to kiss Heero. Wufei entered with dinner; they all took it in turns to shop when they shared a room. Duo was always scared of looking at Heero when Wufei was in the room, once he gave a look of such concentration that Duo was sure he knew, but what can you do? He couldn't let that deter him from seeking Heero though, but he was always cautious.  
  
As they all ate dinner, Duo kept choking on his food as he watched Heero chew and swallow- the way his throat moved up and down. Although they were just eating greasy, take-out pizza, it was still exciting for Duo, and it was as though the other pilots didn't exist, just voices between him and his koibito, Duo would joke with them, but he was always focused upon Heero, wondering if he felt as Duo did. Duo had often wondered what it would be like to have a 'space heart,' if it would let him tell what Heero felt for him, he half wanted that, for closure; to stop teasing himself, but his heart didn't want it to be that way- it felt somehow like lying, something he was opposed to (in most circumstances).  
  
Everyone was getting annoyed at Duo, he would not stop talking. Trowa claimed that it was Duo's turn to clean up, a lie- they didn't take turns, but they all knew that Duo needed that to distract his mouth.  
  
"Hey, waitaminute, I don't remember it being my turn next, it's always my turn!" And so on. Heero said he'd help Duo, to stop the rambling. Duo gave Heero a smile, but it quickly drained away to Heero's cold face. Duo gave Heero another quick grin, flicking his head up, sending his braid flying; he hoped Heero would think of it as cute, but he knew there'd be not visible reaction.  
  
"Maxwell, could you keep it down?" Duo hadn't stopped rambling.  
  
"Huh, sure." 'I wish I didn't have to let my mouth go like that, but otherwise it would just hang open when I'm around him; that would be too obvious.'  
  
As Heero and Duo- well, Heero, cleaned up, the others set up the video player and TV. When the cleaners had finished, they joined Trowa, Quatre and Wufei, bringing over the beanbags Howard had kindly suppled them with. Heero lay down with his back and head on one beanbag; the others would have to share.  
  
"So you do know how to relax, Heero!" Duo teased him a lot like that. 'I only tease, 'cause I have a crush on him'¤ Duo sat down next to Heero, copying his position on the same beanbag. Duo knew Heero wanted one to himself, but Heero didn't protest. Quatre, Trowa and Wufei took the other beanbags, not that Duo took any attention, he was too happy to be with Heero. Someone started the video- a sci-fi/horror flick, the plot slipped past Duo, he was concentrating on being in contact with Heero just enough not to let on that it was on purpose. Occasionally Heero moved away from Duo's skin, but soon returned to the same, comforting position- flat out with their arms lying against one another, and occasionally their legs touching.  
  
"Eugh, that's gross." Duo had been watching the movie and saw something disgusting, normally he would think it was cool, but he wasn't himself just then, Duo cringed as he said it and bowed his head in slightly towards Heero. Duo barely heard Wufei call him weak, but noticed Heero's arms move cautiously as he folded his arms against Duo's, and gingerly reached out his right hand, caressing Duo's bare limb. Time seemed to freeze; was this Heero's testimony to affection? What Duo had been waiting for since the moment he set eyes on him? 'It can't be, can it?' Thoughts and brilliant sensation ran through Duo's mind, paralysing his body, all he could think was the warm touch. Heero stopped abruptly,  
  
"Hn sorry, I thought it was the beanbag," Heero said coolly, without emotion. Duo was so confused by his emotions that he wasn't even sure if it had happened, and he couldn't believe that Heero could love him; his dream come true, he had become so used to the coldness that it hadn't seemed possible, 'but why else? Maybe he was telling the truth,' Duo deemed this unlikely but he couldn't let it slip his mind, 'Maybe he's testing me?' Duo was still scared to reveal his feelings, in case he misinterpreted Heero, so the doubts overran his mind.  
  
The rest of the movie flew by for Duo; he couldn't get Heero's touch out of his mind. Heero had resumed his position on the beanbag, which comforted Duo slightly, but nothing else happened. Soon it was time to sleep. They all slept in their clothes; when you're a soldier, you have to be prepared for some hygiene issues. It was cold, and the pilots were all in sleeping bags, Duo used his as a blanket and tried to sleep as close to Heero as possible. When they went to sleep, Duo was only a few inches away from Heero, and Heero's face was the last thing he saw, the touch the last thing he thought of before he drifted into a pleasant, albeit short sleep. Duo couldn't remember having dreamt anything, he had presumed that he would dream about Heero, but he was way too excited. When he woke up, he realised that his feet were pressed against Heero's, through the sleeping bag. 'Oh, Hee-chan, I'm awake before you for once, and I can enjoy it.' Heero woke up when he heard Duo's raised heart rate and was slightly embarrassed not to be the first one awake, but he set up his laptop normally, ignoring Duo's:  
  
"Good Morning, sunshine!" And his cordial smile with another flick of the braid. Heero woke up the others and went over to his laptop. Duo came over and put his elbow on Heero's shoulder. "We all gogo, He-kun?"  
  
"Kun.? Hn, of course, baka." Finally, 'baka;' another smile, Duo was so happy he even closed his mouth for five minutes and offered to get breakfast, shocking everyone except, of course, Heero.  
  
Duo was too excited, had too many things to think about, so breakfast past uneventfully. Afterwards, the pilots left the room, to get themselves and their Gundams ready for the mission. Duo lingered behind, glossy eyed, as he stared at where he had laid next to Heero, reminiscing. Thinking about what had happened made him feel warm and light- as though he was flying towards Heero, but stung him- he was sure Heero only stopped because he didn't react; even though he knew it wasn't his fault, he couldn't help but blame himself, it was as though he had hurt Heero in some way. Duo walked out of the room; Howard would retrieve everything, then he turned his attention to the mission, 'what if one of us dies? He'd never know how I feel.'  
  
"Hey Heero!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"I.I enjoyed the movie, good choice, huh?"  
  
"Hn, baka." Duo hated it, as he teased himself by saying over and over in his mind 'I love you,' he wished he could bring himself to risk rejection. Do sighed as he closed the door.  
  
  
  
Inspired by "Mysterious Touch" by Eternal Guardian, used with permission. http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=1179381  
  
¤ Think "It's Just Love" 


	2. Everything My Heart Desires

What Would You Say if I told you...?  
  
Act 2: 'Everything My Heart Desires'  
  
Disclaimer: see chapter one Warning: Low level, non-animated violence, mild 2+1, fluffy. Sorry if my geography is off, it's been a long time since I was in Britain.  
  
The mission began. Sandrock, Heavyarms and Shenlong Gundams headed towards the Reading OZ base in South Britain in a carrier, as Deathscythe and Wing flew towards the Glasgow base, both missions- terminate production and destroy everything; part of the plan to eliminate the Taurus suits before they could be employed. Duo had often been sent on missions alone with Heero, but his heart raced every time at the chance to prove his strength to Heero. There was always the fear of either of their deaths; Duo knew he couldn't be as emotionally strong as Heero, to sacrifice himself for the mission callously and without reticence, but the altruism from his love meant that Duo would be almost happy to die for him. Heero never acknowledged Duo's help, claiming he got in the way, but Duo knew he just didn't know how to say 'thankyou.'  
  
Heero flew off ahead in the transformed Wing Gundam, ignoring Duo's protests and the fact that Deathscythe is better suited to infiltration than his Gundam. 'But that's his way, he likes to take the burden all to himself; he really is kind, as well as cute.' Duo followed Heero; the brashness had never stoped Duo before, it just strengthened his resolve, besides, no one truly wishes to be alone, do they? Before, it had often crossed Duo's mind that being close to Heero would hurt him; he was always worried that Heero wouldn't accept his love, but sometimes the detachment from emotion left Duo feeling as though Heero really couldn't handle compassion. At least now Duo had some proof of Heero's humanity, however it represented Heero's empathy- the gentle touch of Heero's hand on his arm, tearing through Duo's heart, burning him, but giving him the clarity to continue his pursuit, if only for to feel that touch again and nothing more. 'Maybe I do wear my heart on my sleeve.' Duo wondered, as he flew over the rolling hills of northern England, every green space reminding him of Heero.  
  
As the Glasgow OZ base came into view, unit2 sped up, there was a path of destruction in front of Duo: Torn apart buildings, melted tarmac and splayed mobile suits- just Leos and Aeries; fortunately the Taurus hadn't been deployed; the schematics were unknown, and not even the Gundam pilots knew their mobile suits capacities. Wing was now in sight and was battling at least twenty Leos.  
  
"Need some help there, buddy?"  
  
"Hn, just don't get in my way." The response was more than Duo could have hoped for; he had expected to be ignored. Powering the beam scythe, Duo rushed a pack of mobile suits. 'Time to meet Shinigami!' The Leos pulled back from the black monstrosity storming towards them, as though they had heard Duo's silent war cry. After carving through the group, Duo turned his attention to the next lot, destroying them with the same ease and grace, hoping that Heero would notice; no such luck. Heero had defeated five mobile suits, leaving a good fifteen left.  
  
"Lure them here." The command was calm and reasonable, but Duo didn't want to lose any respect Heero might have for him by being a lapdog, and, of course, he had always had a streak of defiance.  
  
"What for? You got a plan or something?" Heero didn't bother to respond; Duo knew he had, "well, as long as you know what you're doing." Duo proceeded, feigning cautiousness, towards the remaining troops and fired his Vulcan canon at one, damaging it severely. While the counter-barrage ensued, Duo fled towards Heero, Leos on his trail. As he approached Heero, Duo shouted some cliché to him, flying straight up. Deathscythe gave way to a fully charged buster rifle in the hands of unit1, decimating the OZ forces in one fell swoop. Another assault was launched by a small group of Aeries, but were quickly taken down by the canons of the two blue-eyed pilots.  
  
With the special's defence forces obliterated, Duo and Heero set their minds on the mission objectives; Alliance personnel were fleeing the base but they were ignored by the pilots. One more shot from the buster rifle destroyed the rather obvious hangar holding the unmanned Leos and Aeries mobile suits. It had been decided before that Heero would destroy the Taurus suits, and Duo would terminate production.  
  
"Well from what I can see, the production is taken care of deep underground. There's a lift around here somewhere.hmm.ah! Over there! Guess they weren't expecting us Gundam pilots, ne?"  
  
"Don't underestimate OZ." Duo knew the truth behind the words, the specials often tried to lure the Gundams to their destruction with tricks and false information.  
  
"Well, I guess I'll see you later, take care buddy" Cheerful as ever, Duo set Deathscythe down in the lift, knowing there'd be no reaction from Heero, he watched as Wing flew across the base. 'Just don't get yourself killed and give me strength, Heero, to fight without being distracted by my feelings, but to let them guide me. I know that's how you live.' Duo thought with a romantic, distant look in his eyes, as the ground rose up to obscure his view. 'And I promise I'll come out alive.'  
  
Greeting Duo at the bottom of the elevator were sirens, flashing red lights and a group of modified Leo suits, charging through them to a large corridor, Deathscythe took a few mild hits before it turned around and fired its guns at the enemy, but the extra heavy shield took the damage in their stride. Another torrent of shots forced Duo to evade, hammering his mech into a wall, taking out a large section of the circuitry, the electric shock coursing through the Duos body, unable to be grounded against the insulated floor. Duo yelled out, powered the scythe and hungrily decimated the Leos, slicing the shattered fragments of the metal carcasses to cries of:  
  
"Don't mess with Shinigami!" Detecting more mobile suits approaching, Duo quickly took out a nearby alarm, stopping the awful wailing.  
  
Duo blasted through the wall to reveal the manufacturing plant, unfortunately, the other mobile suits had caught up, the force of their guns knocking Deathscythe onto the floor, but not damaging its Gundamium armour. Duo quickly rolled over his Gundam, blocking the volley with the buster shield. Shinigami charged into the leader, crushing his Leo into the wall, turning his attention on the other three, the scythe swung through the middle of one, continuing its swing around through another before bringing it up and burying the blade into the last suits power plant, causing it to explode in grey shards. Duo hopped out of his Gundam, taking out two incoming guards with one shot and planted a pack of explosives onto the machine in front of him. Duo ran under a maze of conveyor belts, rolled around a corner and planted another set. Then, a pack of mobile suits fired on Duo, as they flew above the production line. 'I have to lead them away from my Gundam.' Duo ran the long way around to his last target, so as not to go anywhere near unit2. Skidding around a corner, a shot narrowly missed the braided boy, the force sending him headfirst towards a wall. Duo pushed his hands against the barrier, spraining his left one, forcing himself upwards and onto the large contraption, just next to the machine he had to plant the explosives on. Duo engaged the magnetic grip on the last bomb and threw it onto the target, sticking it to the machine's metal exterior. Duo leapt onto a conveyor belt, heading back towards his Gundam as bullets sailed past him.  
  
Quickly reaching Deathscythe with the speed of the belt, Duo clambered in and started up before the OZ troops could catch up. Continuously firing his blasters, Duo blew through the many floors to the surface.  
  
"Time to meet Shinigami, OZ!" Duo pushed the detonator button and an expanding cloud of fire and smoke rose out of the hole Deathscythe had created.  
  
"Mission complete." Duo mimicked Heero over the comm.  
  
"Not quite, there's reinforcements and two transports have taken off with Taurus suits aboard." Heero replied calmly, ignoring Duo.  
  
"What?! We can't hold them off and destroy both of them. Wait.where are the transports headed?" The mobile suits were closing in fast.  
  
"One is long range, headed towards Northern Europe. The other is short range, headed towards Reading base." The mobile suits were almost on them now.  
  
"Right, so we'll let the others take care of that one. I'll go after the shuttle; you hold them off." Duo really was making an effort to be strong and decisive.  
  
"Roger!" Deathscythe took off at full speed towards the escaping shuttle, through the laser fire below. Duo caught up with the transport as it approached the North Sea and manoeuvred above the shuttle, swinging the scythe upwards, but the transport engaged boosters and avoided the mighty swing. As the shuttled past over St Andrews's cliffs, Duo picked up a comm.:  
  
"Lieutenant! Unit1 is taking intense fire, thankyou for leading the other Gundam away." 'Heero' Duo mouthed as he drew Deathscythe's Vulcan canons and vaporized the transport.  
  
'Don't die before you know how I feel.' Deathscythe powered back to the base, Duo screaming as he forced a group of Aeries out of his way. Duo reached Wing and saw it surrounded by various mobile suits. It had obviously taken heavy damage.  
  
"Goodbye." 'Goodbye?' Duo thought it seemed a very un-Heero like thing to say, before he realized what it meant.  
  
"HEERO!!" The force and conviction in Duo's voiced shocked Heero, stopping him from pressing the button. Heero remained frozen as images of a giant scythe, explosions, and bullets filled his screen, and time flew by, his hand still on the detonator, but he couldn't press it. Heero didn't move until he heard Duo again.  
  
"Come on, Heero! Get your Gundam on the shuttle! Move your butt, buddy." Duo had learned how to get through to Heero.  
  
"Hn.could you keep it down, baka?" I'm coming."  
  
Aboard a large OZ shuttle, Duo and Heero in the pilot's seats, with their Gundams on the transport deck.  
  
"So we need to pick up the others, and then we can return to school. Doesn't that sound like fun." Duo was babbling again, but he was so happy that Heero survived; his ever-present grin was extra large, showing off his dazzling teeth. It never occurred to Duo that he had saved Heero, he had long since denounced being a hero. The shuttle had taken off, and Duo had laid in a course, when Heero looked at him right in the eyes.  
  
"Duo.thankyou." Thoughts swarmed through Duo's mind, and he got the same feeling of warmth, comfort and kindness as when Heero touched him the night before, but there was no pain. Duo's inhibitions still controlled his mouth, sealing his confession, but he felt no pain. All he could manage to say was:  
  
"Sure pal, no problem." As the shuttle flew out of sight of the Glasgow base, Duo thought, 'You've been so different today- you've shown me gratitude, sincerity and- heck! You've even said my first name. Maybe yesterday did mean something to you.' Duo looked over at Heero, but the cute boy was asleep in his chair and smiling. 'Thankyou Heero, for what you've shown me.'  
  
Duo and Heero picked up Quatre, Wufei and Trowa, but neither said a word about Heero's appreciation of Duo, and they returned to the continent with a normal Heero, and a very happy and extra talkative Duo. 


	3. All That I Could Hope for

What Would You Say if I Told You...?  
  
Act 3: 'All That I Could Hope for'  
  
The Gundam pilots returned from their mission, unknown to OZ, to the coastal town of Boulogne. Although Duo talked almost non-stop, he didn't say a word to Heero, or even look directly at him. Duo knew that it would have been hard for Heero to actually thank him like that- so deep, so close- but what did it meant to him? If only Duo could read the boy's thoughts to see what he wanted, even if wasn't Duo's companionship and care. Then Duo thought about it, 'what if he feels exactly like me?' If Heero was also too scared to say his feelings- the touch, his warm and affable 'thankyou;' his way of reaching out without risking revealing himself openly. Duo couldn't presume that, though, it was more than he could hope for, although it went against his last thought. It had always been as this- thoughts of Heero were plagued with ambiguity, paining him. Duo had always lived a hard life, so he had nothing to loose, but now he had a closeness to Heero, so fragile now that Duo couldn't step too far; slip off the knife blade that would resolve his ambivalence into just sorrow, and cause Heero to withdraw completely, he had that to loose now.  
  
Quatre, Trowa and Wufei stayed in Boulogne, there were rising OZ forces in western Europe and they had all been assigned missions there, but Heero and Duo were to return to school in Japan. Although they didn't need the cover now, they had to keep up appearances. The blue-eyed boys had to return commercial travel; it was hard to travel in times of war, but everything has its price and Heero had access to all the money in the world. The flight to Japan began as hell to Duo; Heero looked so sad, with his head hung and he didn't say a word, not even to ask Duo to be quiet. Duo just wanted to comfort the sad boy, to put his arms around the strong shoulders and bury his face in the messy hair, and to tell him everything's all right, but more than anything he just wanted to say, 'I love you.' Duo couldn't stand it anymore, the shuttle was rather private, two other passengers, both asleep, although they still couldn't reveal themselves as Gundam pilots.  
  
"Why are you so glum, huh?" Heero looked up slightly, 'A breakthrough!' Any little victory like that was so fulfilling. "Everything went well, and now we've got time off." Duo casually put his elbow on Heero's shoulder and pretended to look at the laptop screen. Heero looked up; a small smile and he returned to his laptop. Duo's heart melted- Duo really felt like it was warm honey flowing inside him- and his arm dropped limp by his side as he narrowly stopped himself from gasping. Throughout the trip Duo tried to get that smile back, he managed to get Heero to play cards and even some of the games that came with his laptop, but he didn't smile that way; he smiled when he won (every time), but it was so empty and heartless compared to before, and Heero still hardly said a word. Duo couldn't tell if the other boy was humouring him or really wanted his company, but he didn't feel the anxiety anymore; all that Heero had done in the last few hours gave him lucidity, but it wasn't time yet.  
  
The next day, Heero and Duo landed in Japan and went to school first thing. Explaining their three-day absence was easy, all Heero had to do was change their records electronically. In their dormitory, the pilots changed into their school uniforms, Duo changed in the bathroom, he didn't want to ruin what they had; it really wasn't a physical attraction. Duo had been attracted to people before because they were beautiful, all girls, and that's how he knew it was true love- not at first sight though, he had thought Heero was a real jerk at first, well, actually, he thought he was a rapist, but when he properly knew him, he thought Heero was a jerk. The warmth and kindness that Heero suppressed to become the Perfect Soldier leaked into Duo, infecting his consciousness until all he could think of was the Japanese pilot until it resolved in his mind to love, and then he noticed how cute the boy was. Duo stepped out of the bathroom to see Heero in school uniform; he looked so kawaii, "We should be getting to class." Duo answered with a smile.  
  
Classes didn't go well for Duo. Although he was far ahead of the students around him, Duo was distracted by Heero, not that he let anyone notice; to the other scholars he just seemed spacey, the covert training was even helping his love life. The only class Duo did well in was visual art- a 'warm, emotional composition' the teacher had called it, and Duo gave another grin, but Heero turned away. It was only well after the class had finished when Duo realized that Heero probably thought he was being arrogant and conceited, and throughout lunch it troubled Duo, but he wouldn't apologize, it just didn't seem right somehow. When Heero arrived to eat, Duo had already bought him a platter of various hors d'oeuvres (the food was one obvious advantage of going to private schools) and refused to let Heero pay him back: an apology.  
  
"Thanks for lunch, Duo" Heero said as they sat down. It was different this time; it didn't mean as much for his love, now it was casual and friendly: this was better; Heero was warming up. As they ate lunch, their eyes kept meeting; blue looking into blue for an eternal moment when all of Duo was lost to the beautiful, deep gaze. He didn't feel passion, he didn't feel pain, he didn't taste the food and all he could see was Heero. As every gaze broke, Duo came back to reality for a few seconds and then they locked again. Duo tried small talk, but even he couldn't keep talking.  
  
The afternoon was reserved for sport, Heero had got them places in the school, so he had signed Duo up for the same sports as himself: Horse riding and Fencing. Duo had never ridden a horse before he started school on Earth, and had only tried fencing once before, so he wasn't very good at either and made Heero to sign them up for basketball at the next school. At least there was no Relena here. Riding was first; another archaic, cute uniform, with a blue hat slip (chosen by Duo to match Heero's eyes). Heero was exceptionally skilled at horse riding, which made all of the girls swoon; this just made Duo proud, he was closer to the heartthrob than any of them, and didn't love him for his riding skills. Duo leant over the reigns onto the horse's mane, a fine bay with a strong neck, it easily supported Duo as he stared at Heero's graceful riding, formless but tangible it was like a perfectly performed dance. A jump, and the sun caught Heero's eyes, looking at Duo, the usually cold face had no smile but looked happy; there was a glimmer in the eyes. Heero dropped lightly from his horse and removed the saddle and his hat.  
  
"Nice work buddy! You really are good with animals." Duo called out as he dismounted the horse. A small smile, a slight bow of thanks, then:  
  
"Come on Duo, we have to get to fencing." Heero had referred to him as 'Duo' quite a few times now, but he still couldn't help smiling. The pilots walked over to the fencing room, dropping their saddles and riding clothes, leaving the lush countryside for a dark room, walls lined with antiquated weapons, rack of foils and baskets of white armour. The instructor walked into the room, slightly late and the class began, all of the students had already donned their armour.  
  
"Well? You have foil, you fence!" The instructor sat down to his coffee. That was all the training he ever gave. If it weren't for Heero, Duo wouldn't be able to use a foil at all, 'I have a lot to thank him for,' Duo thought as he faced Heero. Usually, Heero would only fight the strongest fencers as asked, but this time he had been the one to challenge. Heero had taken Duo for training matches before, but this was a real fight, and Duo wondered whether Heero knew how much it meant as a sign of respect to him.  
  
"En guarde, ready? Fence!" The duel started, Heero let Duo attack him, easily parrying the blow, then waited for Duo to recollect himself before lunging properly, narrowly missing the long brown hair that flew across the other fencer's body.  
  
"Hey! Watch the braid!" Duo blocked the second attack, but Heero swung around, catching Duo off guard.  
  
"Touché!" The combatants faced each other, Duo congratulated Heero and they both bowed and smiled before sitting sown together to watch the other fighters.  
  
"That was really quick, I wish I could be as good as you." Duo blushed slightly, looking down at the floor, clasping his hands in his lap. Heero looked over at him, ignoring the compliment.  
  
"You could be very good, you just have to persevere." Heero always knew what to say when he had to and Duo had always thought it made up for him saying so little, it was something he really admired, but he knew better than to deny it, so he just thanked Heero.  
  
After fencing, the students had free time for dinner before a very late curfew. Usually, Heero would sit by his laptop while Duo would lie down on his bed and try to distract him, most of the students went out for dinner but the pilots just ate in the cafeteria. In their room, both boys changed out of their school uniform, but as Duo stepped into the main room, he saw Heero wearing long pants, a t-shirt and jumper- very stylish. Duo had never seen those clothes before, he had gotten used to Heero's unpresentable and rather embarrassing spandex and singlet.  
  
"Do you want to go to a café or something for dinner, Duo?" Although it was unlike anything Heero had ever said before, it didn't seem weird to Duo, he had expected that night to be different when he saw Heero's outfit, and he didn't feel his heart beating as wildly as it had been doing do recently when Heero surprised him. Duo knew Heero was doing it just for him, and he now knew that Heero wanted to be with him, not just being nice, 'but does he love me? But if he cares, then I can tell him anyway, can't I? I don't have anything to worry about if he'll accept me anyway, do I?' Duo just didn't know.  
  
"You sure you don't just wanna stay here and use your computer?"  
  
"Yeah, of course, but you'd never let me, would you?" Heero smiled slightly. 'Whoa! That smile, I've never seen that smile before, is it...for me?' Duo stuck out his tongue playfully, and gave Heero the cutest grin and braid flick he could; it made him feel sort of flakey, but it was a kind of game, so Duo forgave himself and followed Heero out of the room, the laptop remained closed on Heero's bed. "Besides, we won't have another mission for a couple of days, we can enjoy ourselves." 'He really has changed,' Duo thought, as he walked as if in a trance slightly behind the Japanese boy, 'if he doesn't care more about the mission.'  
  
The walk out of the school to a large, rather crowded café was a dream to Duo; hardly aware of himself- his body and his mind acting without consciousness, all of which was focused upon Heero. Sitting at an empty table in a corner of the café, Heero ordered food and drinks for both of them, ordering exactly what Duo would have chosen. Duo was back to reality now, 'he knows what I like; he must pay more attention to me than I knew, I always thought he ignored me.' The two boys talked about school while they waited for their drinks. Duo loved talking with Heero, it was rare to have an actual conversation with him, and this was even better than usual; it was a normal conversation, it made Duo feel like a normal teenager. During dinner, something struck Duo, 'is this a...date? Our first date... Heero, you must care.'  
  
After a very ordinary dinner (for normal teens, very different and special to Duo, and Heero, he hoped), Heero and Duo returned to their dormitory, it was around 10 o' clock and they were both tired after the flight; even Gundam pilots feel jetlag. Duo changed in the bathroom again, into the t-shirt and boxers he slept in. Duo normally waited a while before heading out, in case he stumbled in on Heero, but he heard crying. 'Is that Heero? No, someone must have broken in, I wonder what Heero did to them?' Duo burst out of the door, his hair hanging down out of the braid swaying around him, and he saw just Heero, sitting on his bed, sobbing. Duo walked over to Heero's bed and sat down next to him, Heero was topless, with his head in his hands.  
  
"Duo?" Duo had made up his mind, he couldn't let himself suffer by his own hand anymore. Duo placed his arms on Heero's bare shoulders and pulled the boy closer to him, so that his hair covered the other young man's chest. Heero looked up, his eyes watering, he forced a smile briefly, and then lost it. Duo moved his head down, closing his eyes as his lips briefly met Heero, and then pulled away from the kiss but he could feel Heero following him, reluctant to stop. They both opened their eyes.  
  
"I love you, Heero." Then time stopped, he had risked everything, and had to wait forever for a response.  
  
"I love you too, I really do, I've been trying to tell you for so long and I'm sorry I couldn't say before, but I just couldn't do it, Duo." Replied the boy beneath the shell.  
  
"Why were you crying? I hate to see you like that, it hurts me too." Heero sighed as Duo rubbed circles on his shoulders.  
  
"I hate fighting. I hate it so much, all I want to do is live like all the people around us, but I don't have a choice: I have to fight. But when I'm with you, I...I can live the way I want to, I can live for you. I was crying because my untold feelings were eating me up inside. I'm sorry." The boy bowed his head.  
  
"Heero, you don't ever have to apologize to me, you do so much for me." Duo had never seen himself having a conversation like that with Heero, he'd never thought Heero would be so sensitive, let alone show his self to Duo like that. Duo had always imagined that he would be weak and need to be comforted by Heero, to cry in his arms, despite his fantasies, but he found himself comforting Heero. Their lips touched again, for longer this time and Duo moved his hands to pull there torsos together as Heero clenched his arms to complete the embrace and Duo's hair settled over the other boy's back, tickling him. Heero pulled Duo down onto the bed.  
  
"Heero, I don't want to..."  
  
"Please, just hold me, I cant bear to sleep alone anymore, his eyes filling with pathos, pleading with Duo. No more words. Duo just pulled the sheets over them, and muzzled Heero's hair, before kissing him goodnight.  
  
Heero fell asleep in Duo's arms, smiling, caressing Duo's hands lightly as they held the couple together through the night. 


End file.
